Category Archives: Summer movies

‘Twas Here My Summer Exploded

Posted on by

Summertime! Or, as Prince of Freshland Willard Smith once put it, summersummersummertime! All of its joys (such as the sunshine, the wasps, the ever-present sheen of sticky sweat) pale into insignificance next to my favourite thing in the world ever; the summer movie season. As usual, the anticipation is bound to be much more nourishing than the actual movies themselves, though last year saw an unprecedented bumper crop of excellent popcorn entertainment which should, technically, raise my excitement to even greater levels, what with the summer movie season finally offering brainfood as well as robot wars. Sadly, that 2009 highwater mark and the recent writer’s strike means I’m less excited about this year’s line-up. Sure, I’ll see a fair few, but there’s only one or two I’m goggle-eyed with obnoxious enthusiasm over. My face is sad.

Those who know me have a pretty good idea which movies have me froth-mouthed, but I’ll save that for now, because I’m more interested in what you, the readers of this blog, are most excited about. Just like last year, I want to see what is getting this small cross-section of people most pumped. Sadly, due to RL complications, I forgot to do this earlier, and have therefore included a film that has already been released (The Further Adventures of Logan T. Loganstein And His Whirring Claws Of Kill), but perhaps, if you’ve already seen it, you enjoyed it so much you can’t wait to see it again! I gather it’s depressingly bad hella-exciting. Anyway, here’s the list.

  • Terminator Franchise: Salvage Operation

  • I’d Rather Be Dragged To Hell Than Watch Spider-Man 3 Again

  • JJ Abrams Risks Death by Unwashed Nerd Rage-On

  • Transmogrifiers 2: Return of the Awesome

  • The Curious Case of Wolverine Wutton

  • Angels, Demons, and Probably Ewan McGregor’s Schlong

  • Another Worthless Woody Allen Movie

  • The Unnecessary Remaking of Pelham 123

  • (500) Days of Self-Conscious Indie Movie Quirk

  • The Time-Travelling Bana

  • Harry Potter and the Thing in the Place with the Whatsit

  • Demetri Martin + Ang Lee + Hippies = WTF?

  • District 9 (AKA Neill Blomkamp Rocks Your Face Off)

  • Hott Sam Rockwell’s Lunar Oscar Bid

  • Pixar’s Whassup, Bitches?

  • Depp and Bale in: Untouchablesque

  • Sacha Baron Cohen and the Inevitable Lawsuits

  • G.I. Joe: The Struggle to Give a Shit

  • Quentin Tarantino and the Broken Spellcheck

  • Final Destination: Rube Goldberg’s Revenge

  • Judd Apatow’s Self-Loathing People (feat. The RZA!)

Seriously! The RZA is in the next Judd Apatow movie! I can’t wait, though I’d much rather see a full-length Bobby Digital film than some navel-gazing James L. Brooks homage, no matter how good it is. Anyway, the poll will be up in a sec, and will be around for approximately numerous weeks.

Oh Man, Two New Polls? Give It Up!

Posted on by

Yes, I have added two new polls to this blog, even though I still have one going. I’ve dragged out my superhero poll for ages because I’m enjoying watching the battle between Christian Bale and Robert Downey Jr. so much, though I am predicting a late flurry of votes for Halle Berry, whose involuntary reaction to a blob of catnip moved me so much in Catwoman. Though I should end it soon so as not to clutter the sidebar so much, I felt compelled to gauge the opinion of our readership now that the summer movie season is ending, and what better way to do that than by starting two new polls, for favourite and least favourite films of the past few months.

I’m genuinely curious about how people felt the season went, and so please ignore my childish namechanging and give me some hard data. I know The Dark Knight split opinion down the middle (not helped by the pre-release enthusiasm), and some were angry about Indiana Jones (though I thought it was probably not as horrible as The Last Crusade). I also know that one regular reader will be tempted to vote for Hancock as worst summer movie about fifty times. Don’t do it, man!

Anyway, I am aware that this blog is getting awfully busy, but I hope to rectify that soon with some nifty XML alterations that will get rid of this dreary Tic-Tac Blue template. That will, of course, involve effort and understanding of code, so it won’t be happening too soon, but it will. As demented genius AV Club commenter Z0diac M0therfucker would say, “THIS SHIT IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE”, as former Police 5 host Shaw Taylor would say, “Keep ‘em peeled,” and as Diddy would say, “Vote or die.” (Apologies to Sean Combs fans if I got his name wrong; I lost track of it a couple of years ago and even Wikipedia is unclear, if you can believe that.)